what do u want to be?

Jam 1.45 tengahari aku menghadap pak cik guard selepas berhempas pulas naek tren dari Seremban kembali ke PJ untuk menyertai LEADTRAIN sesi kedua. Walaupon pada awalnya berniat untuk menangguhkannya. Tapi takdir Tuhan menentukan ana menyertai LEADTRAIN kedua,bukan ketiga mahupon keempat.

Selepas beberapa sesi yang ku kira 'bole la'. Malamnya Bro. Izdihar training semua participant. Not bad. Tamau cite panjang.

Brother Izdihar, Brother Azmi Sulong buat gerakan bagi Mic kat sesapa yang nak jawab soalan mereka.

Soalannya banyak.
Antaranya,

WHAT DO U WANT TO BE?

"i want to be a lecturer because i like to teach."

"i want to make my parents happy."

"i want to struggle hard in my life.."

"i want to SYAHID FISABILILLAH.."

there are to many answers. Me? i dont give any answer to the speaker?
Heh, why i am too silent?

Am i am very shy?

Because i think.. I dont know what i want to be.

Speechless.

There are

too many i want to be.

I said that,
"i want to be a person that people never be.. I want to be myself. A person that has my own succesful. I dont want to demand on other succesful. I dont want to be Sheikh Muzaphar, I want to be better than him. I want to be myself."

Liyana said,
"husna nak jadik ALLIEN?"

"nope. Better than that. I want to be a new person and one day everyone want to be like me. I want to be a very independent person, not rely on anyone. i want to build my own personality, i dont want to copy anyone.. except.. him.."

i look at someone.
There, he is standing there. With sweet face.

"Nabi Muhammad.. Innama...makarimul akhlak.."

Yeah, thats is my aim to be."

Liyana mengangguk.
"bagosnya."

Adlina kat sebelah tak habes2 dengan statement,

"doktor ni tade life la.."

"what u mean by 'life' Ad?"

"life tu life laa.. Doktor tade life.. Siyes cakap.."

"aduh. Doktor ade je life. tak tipu. ade je."

"ok. aku nak ko buktikan.."

"Ad,masalahnya aku bukan doktor pon. tamau pon jadik doktor. Sebab doktor.."

"sebab doktor tade life kan..??"

"huh. tak. sebab jadik doktor nanti tak sempat nak layan "suami"..."

haha. He smile. me too. Ad blur.. Haha.

"suami" is dakwah. islam. and perjuangan.

"nanti aku nak tulis dalam blog.."

"haa.. tulis2.. sempat lagi ko update blog. katenye busy sangat."

tah. no idea.

....

Session 3 finished.

"husna, pegi tido,esok nak QIAM."

"eh,bukan tiap2 hari ke kite QIAM?"

ting.. ting.. ting..

"moga2 amalan kite kat DQ istiqamah sampai ke sini."

"insya allah jika Allah izinkan.."

"ya. jika Allah izinkan dan jika kita mahukan.."

huh.
mengantuk.

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:: "Allahumma faqqihna fiddin, wa 'allimna takwil, wahdina ilas sawa'is sabiil" ::

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:: Ya Allah, kurniakanlah kami kefahaman yang mendalam tentang ilmu agama, dan ajarkanlah kepada kami ilmu yang boleh memahami sesuatu yang tersirat, dan tunjukkanlah kepada kami jalan yang sebenar2nya. :) ::

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